May 2013
saboobnah:
bird privilege is being able to make loud as fuck noises early in the morning without somebody calling the cops on you
me: makes a mistake
me: thinks about mistake every night for the next 7 years
Psychiatric Advice #12
Patient: I keep having these crazy dreams where I'm swimming in a river next to the Pyramids! What's wrong with me?
Psychiatrist: You're in da Nile.
jesuislegrandefromage:
emily-spectre:
psilentasincjelli:
C a r r y o n m y w a y w a r d s o o o o o o o n
T h e r e ’ l l b e p e a c e when y o u a r e d o o n e
L a y y o u r w e a r y h e a d t o r e e e e e e s t
D o n ’ t y o u c r y n o m o r e
FINALLY AN ACCURATE ONE
This is probably one of the reasons the rest of the world thinks we...
“Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!”
– Sylvia Plath (via incorrectsylviaplathquotes)
“We’ve all been raised on television to believe that one day we’d all be...”
– Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club (via dreamsilver)
My hobbies include laying in bed in my underwear while I listen to music and hate myself
ieatgokudera:
EYELASHES YOU ARE SUPPOSE TO PREVENT SHIT FROM FALLING IN MY EYE BUT WHEN YOU FALL IN MY EYE THEN WHAT AM I SUPPOSE TO DO YOU WERE MY LAST LINE OF DEFENSE AND YOU BETRAYED ME
whorville:
I have bullshitted my way through almost two decades of life
thefrenchshipmutiny:
thisis-my-note:
flying-inca56:
“Tony no” a biography by Pepper Potts
“Tony stop” a sequel by Steve Rogers
“Goddammit Tony” a prequel by James Rhodes
“Women who are too sexual aren’t taken seriously, and women who aren’t sexual...”
– (via ceedling)
If you’re pretty, you’re an object. If you’re ugly, you’re a worthless object.
We really really really can’t win.
(via thedollydamnllama)
Me: gets nervous a year before a planned event
my suicide note: i'm fat and i can't do math homework
“A three-day-old human embryo is a collection of 150 cells called a blastocyst....”
– Sam Harris, on stem cell research. (via we-are-star-stuff)
me in other people's showers: what the fuck is going on
If you’re a “nice guy” to a girl up until you realize she doesn’t want to date you, then go on about how she’s a cold shrew that friendzoned you and how no girls date nice guys, like, nah mate, girls do date nice guys. You just aren’t a nice guy. You’re a passive aggressive beta with internalized misogyny and a serious victim complex.
Update from Australia: A school boy has been suspended for 15 days due to throwing a vegemite sandwich at prime minister Julia Gillard.
me in 7th grade: unattractive, socially awkward loser.
me now: unattractive, socially awkward loser with good taste in music.
humancentipeed:
In the Sims, you don’t say, “I love you.” You say, “Habadu bashubi,” which roughly translates to, “I cannot move because there is furniture in the way.” I think that’s absolutely beautiful.
annathing: ekiaku: hueywasright: noiradoue: You... →
ekiaku:
hueywasright:
noiradoue:
You guys are ridiculous. Why shouldn’t a white person be in the natural hair tag? Because they have a different texture? Shut the fuck up. Just because they haven’t been perming and messing up their natural hair all of their lives and now have to…
i didn’t even know anything about this, what. i have done a lot to my hair, dyed it since i was...
